Disillusioned Page 9

  How she’d turned out so lovely in the midst of growing up around her family, he wasn’t sure. While her parents had been all about success and money, Nikki’s focus had been on other people.

  He remembered her sharing how a friend at school had invited her to church. Her life had been changed after that moment, and she’d become dedicated to the Lord. She’d ended up going on a mission trip with her church, and she’d been struck by a desire to help people across the world who had nothing.

  His instincts told him that something had changed. Something big had shifted in her belief system, replacing her hope with cynicism. He could sense it in her comments, in the way she looked uncomfortable when he prayed. No longer did she talk about God’s leading in her life or how she trusted that things were in His hands.

  What had happened? How had someone so passionate gone from a life of trusting God to a life of resenting God?

  When they’d met, Kade had fallen in love quickly, more quickly than he thought was possible. Nikki would never understand the reasons why he’d had to break up with her, and he’d been unable to speak in specifics since they weren’t married. He’d wanted to explain, but by the time he’d been able to, it was too late. She was married, and the conversation would have been inappropriate.

  Was God giving Kade a second chance to explain himself? Is that why they’d been brought together again in the most unlikely circumstances?

  He turned over again, jerking the blanket around him. He couldn’t think like that. He had to stay focused on keeping Bobby and Nikki safe. That was his only objective. But the stakes seemed to be rising. Though he knew it was best for Bobby if they stayed in one place and kept things as level as possible around them, their chance of doing that was quickly diminishing. The authorities would be closing in on them soon. It was just a matter of time.

  Then there was Desmond. All the boy had to do was tell one of his friends who watched the news, and their hideout would be blown. He hadn’t told Nikki, but he’d called Marti and asked her to pay Desmond for his silence. According to Marti, the boy’s eyes had lit, and he’d promised his loyalty. Kade only hoped the boy was telling the truth. Kade still couldn’t help but feel that being here at this house was their safest bet, at least at this point.

  He needed a plan. But with so little to go on, their only hope seemed to be evading the people chasing them.

  Kade wasn’t good at being on the defensive. As a SEAL, he’d always taken charge and led missions. This was much different than anything he’d ever worked on before.

  Lord, I’ll take any guidance you can give me now.

  Unable to sleep, Kade stood and made his way downstairs. As he reached the bottom step, he saw that Bobby was no longer on the couch. Instantly his back muscles tensed.

  He’d just been there.

  Kade had even considered sleeping in a chair downstairs so he could keep his ears open for any movement by Bobby. But Bobby had been sleeping so hard that he’d decided not to.

  Bad idea.

  Moving cautiously, Kade rounded the corner, looking for signs of anything suspicious. The door was still closed. The windows appeared to be down.

  He still couldn’t relax. Not until he found Bobby.

  Kade stopped abruptly in the kitchen.

  Bobby stood dead still at the counter with his back to him.

  Kade released his breath. Good. He was okay. Kade hadn’t been sure what to expect in light of everything that had happened lately.

  “Bobby, what’s going on?” Kade took a step toward him. “Having trouble sleeping?”

  Bobby pivoted away from the sink. A butcher knife gleamed in his hand. Kade sucked in a quick breath, instantly going on guard. Bobby’s eyes were glazed and his movements robotic.

  “We’ve got to kill them all,” he muttered.

  Then he lunged at Kade.

  CHAPTER 14

  Kade jumped out of the way before the blade could slice into him.

  Bobby’s eyes looked crazed as he faced off against Kade. He was in a fighting stance with his arms and knees bent, ready to lunge again. Kade copied his position, unsure how all of this was going to play out. Tension crackled in the air.

  The last thing he wanted was to hurt Bobby. But Kade also didn’t want to be hurt by Bobby. Besides, Bobby in this state might take Kade out and then go after Nikki.

  Kade couldn’t let that happen.

  “Bobby, put the knife down,” Kade urged, watching his every move for a sign of another attack. His adrenaline heightened his instincts, and at once he felt like he was back in Iraq, facing off against insurgents, fighting for his life, breathing in slow motion.

  “They’re coming.” Bobby’s face quivered as he said the words, but his eyes retained their blank, glazed look. “Don’t you know that they’re coming? I have a duty. They must die.”

  He lunged at Kade with the knife again.

  Kade jerked away, hitting the table behind him. A picture crashed to the floor, and the glass shattered on the tile below.

  Kade had avoided the blade again—this time. But it was nearly impossible to predict erratic behavior. He couldn’t even guess what Bobby might do next.

  “Bobby!” Nikki gasped behind him on the stairway. She scrambled down to the ground level. “What are you doing?”

  “Go back up to your room, Nikki,” Kade told her, never taking his eyes off Bobby. One slipup could result in losing his life.

  “What’s going on?” Nikki’s voice plunged, and she sounded like her hero had fallen. He might have.

  “Really, Nikki. You need to go back to your room,” Kade said. He didn’t want to think about what might happen to her down here. What she might watch her brother attempt. Some memories couldn’t ever be erased or undone.

  Nikki ignored him. “Bobby, you’ve got to listen to me. Put the knife down.”

  Bobby’s gaze switched to her, still dull and not all there. “I have a duty.”

  “A duty to do what?” Her voice wavered.

  “To kill them. I must kill them.”

  The room went still. His words were chilling. Kill who? Americans? Members of ARM? Either way, Kade didn’t like this.

  “Nikki, I really need you to leave,” Kade said, his eyes still on Bobby as he tried to anticipate his next move. “Please.”

  “No. This is my problem, not yours. I’m the one who managed to get him out of military custody. This is my fault.”

  “I’m afraid this goes beyond both you and me,” Kade said. His heart panged for her, for the heartache and guilt in her voice.

  Nikki ignored him. “Bobby, you remember that time you wanted to beat up that kid at school who was giving you a hard time?”

  His face remained unchanged and expressionless. “No, I can’t remember.”

  “His name was Danny Williams. This was before your growth spurt. Danny used to give everyone a hard time, and one day on the playground he tripped you. Do you remember that?”

  “Maybe.” He still held the knife, but it trembled in his hand. His breathing seemed to slow, to appear less frantic.

  Kade knew he had to make a move soon. Nikki was doing a good job distracting her brother.

  “You told me something I’ve never forgotten. You told me that the sign of the bigger person was to never prey on the innocent. Do you remember that?”

  Bobby stared at her a moment and then rapidly shook his head. “I . . . I don’t know. I don’t know. Maybe.”

  “Bobby, you need to be the bigger person right now. Don’t hurt Kade. Please. He’s trying to help us. He’s risked everything to be here.”

  Bobby plunged his hand forward as if trying to jab someone invisible with a sword. His hand trembled uncontrollably, the knife gleaming with each movement.

  “Bobby, there’s a better way,” Nikki said. “A way that doesn’t end in destruction. There’s already been too much of that. In your life. In mine. In our family. Please don’t cause any more. Please.”

  Bobby froze, but remai
ned expressionless. Had Nikki’s words gotten through to him? Or was he gathering energy for another attack?

  Finally Bobby’s fingers loosened. The knife clattered onto the tile floor as he fell to his knees and let out a long, gut-wrenching sob.

  Quickly Kade grabbed the knife and placed it on top of the refrigerator, out of Bobby’s reach. Nikki was already at her brother’s side. Her arms were around him as she murmured something to him.

  Another scare involving Bobby. Things had worked out again this time . . . but how much longer could they say that?

  First thing the next morning, as soon as Nikki clomped down the stairs, Kade met her. He was freshly showered, his hair still glistening and damp, and a minty scent surrounded him. But there was also a heaviness about him.

  Nikki knew why: Bobby.

  The incident last night had shaken them both.

  After a lot of talking and prodding, they’d finally gotten Bobby to move from his fetal position in the kitchen to his bed. Afterward, neither Kade nor Nikki had any words for the other. What did you say after a showdown like that?

  Had her dream beforehand been some kind of subconscious warning of what was to come? And what had Bobby meant last night when he kept saying “duty”? The memory tightened Nikki’s lungs, and a tremble raked through her.

  She’d like to think she was protecting Bobby. But more and more evidence seemed to indicate that she could be protecting the wrong person. The thought made her heart ache.

  She couldn’t deny the facts much longer.

  “How are you this morning?” Kade asked, his gaze discerning and worried as he studied her.

  She shrugged and leaned against the wall. She needed something to hold her up because her strength was fading. “I’m a mess, to be honest. I don’t know what to think. I don’t want to put other people at risk by having Bobby here. Are we being stupid, Kade? Do I need to march my brother to the police myself?”

  Kade frowned and crossed his arms. The melancholy that surrounded him bothered Nikki almost as much as the incident last night.

  “He needs help,” Kade said. “But I’m not convinced he’s going to get it at the hands of the government. They aren’t always known for their compassion. That said, I agree with you—it’s unsettling to have him here and at large. He’s dangerous. We need to remember that.”

  Her stomach turned with unease. Every option she thought of seemed to lead to only more hurt or pain. She had to choose what she believed to be the lesser of two evils.

  “Can we just give it two more days?” she asked. “If this keeps escalating, we can reevaluate. We can turn him in. Take him to the authorities ourselves.”

  Kade stared at her, his eyes calculating something, before he finally nodded. “Two days.”

  “Thank you,” she whispered, the air leaving her lungs in a whoosh. She had been so certain Kade was going to insist they turn Bobby in. And she questioned her own sanity. She knew if Bobby hurt anyone, the blame would rest on her. She had to keep an eye on him and make sure he stayed on track, for not only her sake but everyone else’s.

  “Nikki, I’ve been thinking,” Kade started. “We talked about Raz earlier and his connection with everything that’s happened since Bobby arrived back.”

  “Right.”

  “It makes him look suspicious.”

  “Raz?” She shook her head. “No way. He’s always been there for me, almost like a father. I wouldn’t have gotten through all of this without him.”

  Kade squeezed his lips together. “He’s the one who arranged the Steel Guard guys, and look how that turned out.”

  “No, Kade. I know him. He’s trustworthy.” Her voice left no room for doubt.

  “That may be true. But we still need to learn who he spoke with at Steel Guard and who else knew about Bobby’s discharge.”

  Kade had raised a good point. There was a leak somewhere. “You’re right.”

  “The question is: What’s the best way to communicate with him?”

  Nikki sucked on her bottom lip. “I’m not sure I’m comfortable contacting anyone outside of this house unless it’s absolutely necessary.”

  “We’re in agreement. I don’t want to take any risks. But I think we’ve reached the point where it’s a necessary risk. We can’t just stay here like sitting ducks. If we’re going to get out of this situation, we need answers.”

  Kade was right. Bobby needed help, and they needed to move forward.

  “You really think Raz has the answers?” she finally said.

  “I think he’s a good place to start—if you’re sure you can trust him.”

  She nodded. “I’m . . . I’m sure.”

  Kade pulled a phone from his pocket, his gaze locked on hers. A tinge of doubt lingered in the back of his eyes. “Can you call Raz? Trust him—but not too much. Only share what’s absolutely necessary. Don’t offer any information.”

  Nikki frowned. She didn’t like being rushed. She liked to think things through, to weigh her options, to consider all possible outcomes. “Authorities are probably tracing his phone calls.”

  “This phone is untraceable. I daisy chained it to another cell phone that I left in a PO box in Maryland. You should be okay.”

  “I’ll have to trust you on that one.” She shifted uncomfortably. What she’d said was true. She really was going to have to trust him. She had little choice at this point. “What do you want me to tell him?”

  “I have a list of questions that he may have the answers to, starting with Steel Guard. Find out who he spoke with there.” Kade squeezed her arm. “I can do this if you want.”

  “I’m just nervous.”

  “Nothing wrong with being nervous. It will keep you alert and sharp.”

  With a determined nod, Nikki took the phone. “Let’s do this then.”

  Kade moved her into the office and shut the door. She lowered herself on a love seat in the corner and punched in Raz’s familiar number. Kade sat beside her, drawing close so he could hear the conversation.

  She flushed at his nearness. She had to stop reacting like that around him. But as his skin brushed hers, she felt a rush of attraction, and warmth filled her.

  He answered on the second ring. “Raz Jennings.”

  “Raz, it’s Nikki.” She didn’t sound like herself. Her voice trembled and was higher pitched than normal. Hearing herself only confirmed and increased her anxiety.

  But Raz’s familiar voice brought a moment of comfort. It immediately lost that cocky edge and was replaced with concern and relief. “Nikki? Where are you? What’s going on?”

  “It’s a long story.”

  “There are a lot of people looking for you. Looking for Bobby. What happened after the hospital? I know you guys never made it to the rental house.”

  “I have to keep him safe.”

  “I know, Nikki. I can help. Tell me where you are and let me help you.”

  She wanted Raz’s help. He’d always been there for her. But right now she had to make a choice between Raz and Kade. Kade was the man who’d broken her heart. Yet at the moment, he was the one she had to side with. “It’s better if you don’t know.”

  He paused for a moment and lowered his voice, almost if his thoughts had transitioned from compassionate father to unwavering legal counsel. “This isn’t good, Nikki. Running makes Bobby look guilty, and the fact you’re helping him could get you in a lot of trouble. It was one thing before the fire, but now—”

  Kade motioned for her to speed the conversation up.

  “Raz, I have questions,” she continued.

  “I’ll only answer them in person.”

  Nikki glanced at Kade. He shook his head, leaving no room for argument.

  “That’s not an option,” Nikki said, feeling as if she was letting down the man who’d been like a second father to her.

  “Nikki, you don’t understand. I know who set the fire. I know where the bomb-making materials came from.”

  She straightened, suddenly eag
er to listen, eager for answers. “What? What do you know?”

  “I can’t tell you over the phone.”

  “Why not?”

  “It’s complicated, Nikki.”

  “This sounds like a trap, Raz. Just tell me what you know.” Desperation had crept into her voice.

  “I can’t, Nikki.”

  “If I come out of hiding then I’m putting myself in danger.”

  “I won’t change my terms. But look, you can tell me where and when you want to meet. Take whatever precautions you need to.”

  Kade motioned for her to cover the mouthpiece. His face looked stormy as he stared at her, and she could tell he was uncomfortable with Raz’s ultimatum.

  “Tell him you’ll meet him in Richmond at two,” he finally whispered. “Tell him you’ll call on his cell thirty minutes beforehand and tell him the exact location.”

  Anxiety crept up her spine, but she nodded and told Raz what Kade had instructed her to say.

  Raz let out a long sigh. “Richmond at two today. I’ll be there.”

  “I’ll be in touch.”

  Nikki hung up, anxiety churning in her gut. “I didn’t think you’d agree to meet him,” she told Kade.

  He pressed his lips together. “I’m not comfortable with it, but he didn’t give us very much choice. At least we’re calling the shots about when and where to meet. That will limit the possibility the authorities will be able to set up surveillance.”

  “Makes sense.”

  “We need to know what he knows.” Kade tapped his foot impatiently. “There’s something else that’s been bugging me. I’ve worked with plenty of guys at Trident who’ve had PTSD and taken meds, but none of them have acted like Bobby. I’ve got a friend in Richmond, a pharmacist. I want to take some of Bobby’s medications to him to check out.”

  Nikki’s eyes widened. “You think someone tampered with Bobby’s meds?”

  “It’s a possibility worth exploring. Something’s wrong with your brother. We need to find out what.”

  She nodded somberly. “I know. I know.”

  They left at nine, giving themselves plenty of time for the three-hour trip, driving Jack’s Ford Explorer. They were less likely to be recognized this way, and Kade knew he had to take every precaution necessary.